One thought on “Wake Up Call on November Sixteenth”
This haiku has potential, but could use a bit more thought. For example, you could strengthen your last line. I would go with a sound that’s being muted or softened by the snow, like “train whistle muffled.” Snow doesn’t “conceal everything white”, by the way. You maybe want to say renders or makes everything white, or covers everything in white?
This haiku has potential, but could use a bit more thought. For example, you could strengthen your last line. I would go with a sound that’s being muted or softened by the snow, like “train whistle muffled.” Snow doesn’t “conceal everything white”, by the way. You maybe want to say renders or makes everything white, or covers everything in white?